spiced up spaghetti from a jar. it's so good, you'll die.

If you ever want to have the best friggin spaghetti of your life (maybe), you'll do what I say.

I LOVE spaghetti. I make it every week, and if my husband would let me, I'd make it twice a week (prob'ly).

I also love money. And expensive jars of yummy spaghetti sauce cost lots of money.

In addition, I love free time. So not waiting an hour for my sauce from scratch to simmer down to a thickness that won't leak water onto the bottom of my plate of noodles is important to me.

If you are plagued with these concerns, by all means, read on, dear student.

HERE'S HOW TO MAKE YOUR JAR OF SPAGHETTI SAUCE FRIGGIN TERRIFIC, as I said earlier:

First, make sure you have all these ingredients:

1 pound of ground beef ($3)
olive oil, some
kosher salt
pepper
1 teaspoon (or more) crushed garlic (spend 50 cents, get a freaking garlic bulb)
1/2 regular sized onion (you decide if you want white, yellow, sweet, whatever) (also, $1)
1 or 2 handfuls of bulk mushrooms ($1)
1 jar of generic spaghetti sauce--the cheapo kind ($1.50)
10 or so basil leaves (or dried if you don't have this)
oregano
parsley
red pepper flakes
whatever other spices you might like---try them out! :)
optional zucchini (50 cents)
1 regular sized bag spaghetti noodles (you know, the kind you think will never be enough but it really is) ($1)
1 regular sized can of petite diced tomatoes (75 cents)

So hopefully you already have all those spices, and if you do, you're looking at $8.25 for a giant pot of spaghetti that will feed a whole family, or 2 ravenous people for almost 3 meals.

Okay, you've gathered up all this stuff from your pantry and your fridge and from the store. Get to cookin':

1. Turn on the heat to medium with a big saute pan. Add like a tablespoon of oil after it's hot (add it before it's hot and your kitchen will fill with smoke, so if you like that...)
2. Start your noodle water. A ton of it. 
3. Chop your onion. Go fast so it doesn't burn out your eyeballs. Add it to the oil and get it cookin.
4. Add garlic. You can add more or less depending on how much garlic you like. Seriously though, just try out going all in, I bet you'll like it.
5. Also add in your sliced or chopped mushrooms. And your chopped zucchini if you're game for that.
6. Season with salt and cook for a couple minutes so the onions get soft and your mushrooms aren't dry.
7. Add beef. Yum! Season with salt and pepper (pretty liberally). And brown.
8. Cooky, cooky, waity waity.
9. Your water should be boiling so go ahead with your noodles, and make sure your boiling water tastes like sea water with salt.
10. You may drain your meat if you so desire, but I don't really. Whatever. Unless I go way cheap and buy like 60/40 beef.
11. Add your jar of sauce along with the can of tomatoes. Oh, be sure to watch your heat and stir slowly so it doesn't volcano up onto your hand and burn your fingers off.
12. Add spices and basil leaves! You can cut up the basil or throw them in whole, both are good. Try starting out with a layer of spices that covers the top of the sauce, and stir it up. TASTE IT to see if you want to add more spices of any kind. I go for about a little less than a tablespoon of oregano, a tablespoon of parsley, a pinch of red pepper flakes, and sometimes a sprig of rosemary if I have it fresh and I'm feeling pine-treeish. Lots of people swear by bay leaves, but I hate fishing them out. Besides, we aren't simmering that long anyways.
13. I can't stress this enough--make sure you taste it and adjust all your spices, including salt and pepper. If you want it a little sweeter, add a teaspoon of honey. 
14. Let it simmer while your noodles cook.
15. Drain your noodles, and combine. I love to combine. It's not required, but it reminds me of being a kid again where I never had to mix my own pasta on my plate :)
16. Top generously with parmesan.
17. Eat. And eat a second plate. 
18. Come back to my blog and leave me lots of compliments for resurrecting your spaghetti night.

P.S. Your kids ages 1-15 might hate you for making this with mushrooms. 

P.S.S. Your husbands will love you and kiss you all over for making this. The next day. They'll be too full to leave the table the night of.

P.S.S. You'll love you for making this because you'll have an amazing lunch to bring to work the next day, and all your co-workers will be jealous of the smells coming out of your microwave.

P.S.S.S. I don't pay attention to how many ounces are in cans and jars, and how many grams my noodles weigh. Use your brains. "Regular" means the most common size, the traditional size. Don't Biggie-Size your cans of tomato.